Bra-Flinging Time by Special Guest Linda Swift

Happy Endings is pleased to welcome author Linda Swift to the blog today to share a moment of holiday fun:

My husband and I lived for a time in Kingston-upon-Hull in Northern England and made many trips across the Atlantic while there. One flight was just before the holidays and I was bringing a bag of Belgium chocolate angels, each about a foot tall.  Due to strong head winds, our plane arrived late in Atlanta and when we cleared customs and collected our bags, we had five minutes to catch the plane to Nashville.

We bumped our way to the back of the crowded plane to claim the last two available seats. (which were in the middle on opposite sides of the aisle)  My husband tried to stash our four carry-ons overhead but all the bins were completely full so we attempted to stash them under our seats. A big no-nonsense attendant told us we had to check them since there was no room for them inside.

“But we can’t,” I wailed.”We’ve got cookies and breakable stuff in them.”

“You have to check them,” she commanded.

Remembering those expensive chocolate angels, I resisted. “Well, we can’t.” I put one bag on the floor and placed my feet on it, still holding the angels in my lap.

“You can’t put it there,” she screeched.  “The man at the window couldn’t get out in an emergency.”

“Lady, if there’s an emergency, I can get over that bag,” he assured her.

The nice man on the aisle helped me poke the bag under the seat in front of me and people all around were helping us satisfy the grouchy attendant so we could get underway. After our forty-five minute ride, my husband suggested we get off last as we had to hunt for our bags under surrounding seats.

As he was retrieving the last bag, I cautioned him to be careful and the lady behind him added with an amused smile, “Yes, don’t break the cookies.”

I imagine several passengers had a good laugh about the couple who boarded the plane after a shopping trip in Atlanta with a bag full of cookies. Little did they know those “cookies” had crossed the Atlantic. And I’m happy to report that not a single angel was crushed.

On this two week holiday we arrived in Nashville where our children live, drove to our Kentucky townhouse, back to Nashville to fly to Florida and spend a few days in our condo, back to Nashville, then on to Kentucky. I was packing once again for the drive to Nashville and flight back to England. We had five bags, three of them carry-ons, sitting empty in the bedroom. Stacks of clothes covered the bed, drawers were open, toiletries lined the bathroom sink, food items filled the kitchen table. I suddenly realized I had packed six times and still had two to go.

“I can’t do this again,” I said to the empty room. Then on an impulse, I grabbed a handful of clothes from the nearest stack and flung them toward the ceiling. A bra and pair of pantyhose hit the ceiling fan and hung there. That felt good, so laughing hysterically, I picked up another handful and flung that, too.

Hearing the noise, my husband came to the bedroom door, took one look at the scene and fled back to the den without a word. When I had gotten that moment of madness out of my system, I proceeded to pack as usual and we concluded our eight-leg journey as planned. But ever after, when I am overwhelmed with preparations of any sort, I will announce that it is bra-flinging time and my family knows to keep a low profile until the moment passes.

Visit Linda at http://www.lindaswift.net/Home_Page.html

Linda’s latest release: LET NOTHING YOU DISMAY can be found at Wild Rose Press